Are you a self-disciplined, Type-A, intense, headstrong, over achiever. An independent, self-made, endlessly maxed out busy person? Never able to fully relax. And certainly not able to say no? Then this one is for you my kindred soul.
Yes- I’ve said it. I acknowledge it…. And I have been for as long as I can remember. It’s me. I am the one who comes in takes over, gets it done, and leaves. A whirlwind of schedules, plans, and executions (literally and figuratively).
I suppose it comes from dark deep seeded childhood rhetoric reminding me if I didn’t work hard and stay involved in school and extra-curricular activities I would be no better than my real mother. And, we will just leave those sorted details alone (and should she ever read this…I’m sorry). So the take away--from a young age I was a Type-A, overachiever, perfectionist. Awesome. Here’s what it got me:
- A far cry from my rough beginnings
- An amazing husband with three incredible kiddos
- An awesome house in an equally as awesome neighborhood in one of my most favorite cities!
- A double degree in both Biology and Nursing
- An awesome job where I get to use both degrees and critical thinking
- A nutrition and fitness career that is taking off in ways I’d never imagined
And here’s the kicker:
- I’m tired…better yet exhausted
- Overwhelmed
- Working myself to the point of no fun
See that’s the problem with us types. We go and go giving more and more until we can’t. Is it the fear of failing or somehow not being perfect? I don’t know anymore. Truly I don’t. honestly I think it’s just become me and my way of functioning for so long – that it’s just…me.
Does this sound like you too? Are you just plain worn out? And yet still take on more? Are you constantly shuffling schedules and life to somehow make it all fit? What are you sacrificing to make it happen? Where are you actually failing?
So what now? Now the nerve has been struck. Now you feel like shit and are immediately restructuring everything in your head quickly to make it work---sunshine and rainbows again? You’re going to be the one that’s different. You will make it work; after all you have for so long now.
Gang, at some point you have to say no. I know it’s ridiculously, unnaturally hard to do. It goes against everything you are. Like pit of your stomach, the runs, palpitations…I get it. Here’s the thing, you have to!
Take a look at everything you do in a day. A good long hard look. What is a priority and what isn’t. it may vary from day to day. And that’s okay too. Little by little start to prune out what isn’t super important. And here’s a good lesson I learned from a fellow yogi just yesterday: “ just because this path has ended for now doesn’t mean it’s a bridge that is burned or that you may not pick up on this path later in life; it just isn’t the path you need to be focused on now. And that’s okay. (and here’s the best part) I still love you, I still love Kris and I still want to hangout, do our lunch dates, stay connected.”
Read that above again, I know I’ve had to. Maybe this it the biggest part of the journey? Realizing that everything Is not black and white. Either you succeed and physically are doing the work or you fail. Nope there’s an awful lot of gray out there. Not to most comfortable place to hangout for us types, but hey—it’s a new challenge to conquer.
If you are struggling with this and don’t know where to start, I’d absolutely love to chat. I bet we can turn this thing around and live life fully!
Take a day to stay in pj’s all day, don’t shower, don’t rush, don’t make plans. A day to take a walk with someone or by yourself and admire the beauty of the universe. A day to forget the to do’s and remember the reason why you’re working so hard in the first place. It isn’t easy. It’s like any other bad habit…. It takes time and consistency, but you’ll get it. This much I promise you—one day somehow you’ll get it. Just don’t let it be too late.